I nearly called the police

Last night it was a typical Monday night, I went to bed by myself as usual. For those of you that dont know, Marcus works nights so this is our "norm". At 1:45am or so (as in....the MIDDLE of the night). I was awakened by a man with his face buried in my neck. This is one of my worst fears ever...... Something bad happening while I am home alone with the girls. No one would hear my screams. No one would know to come get the girls (that is if the scary man didn't hurt them too). I am always going over my "plan" in my head. Who would I grab first? What my exit strategy would be? What clothes they would need according to the weather? Would I grab food (you know me, I'm always thinking about food!)? Where would we go? Would we run or be able to take the car? Oh and most importantly DON'T FORGET MY PHONE! These are things I think about nearly every night before I go to bed. So it is no wonder I haven't slept good for the past, well like 3 years. I have really struggled with getting good solid sleep. I have trouble falling asleep and if I am lucky enough to get to sleep then the struggle is to stay asleep. I hear the slightest noise and it wakes me, then I cant get back to sleep. I take simply sleep on occasion if I know that I really need to get my sleep, but I am really afraid that it will become a habit for me, so i try to only take it as a last resort. Even the nights that I enjoy a glass of wine or 2 I still have trouble sleeping. And what is even more frustrating than being completely exhausted and not being able to sleep is when Marcus gets in the bed he can fall asleep in less than 6 seconds. And I am NOT exaggerating!

why do I always get off on tangents when I try and tell a story? maybe thats why i never got around to calling the police this morning.

Like I said I was awakened this morning by a man in my face, I did not hear the garage door open (our bedroom is right by the garage), I did not hear the door open, I must have slept through the alarm being disabled, my guard dog (AKA Tahoe) did not alert me to any danger well at least I didnt hear him if he did. In my sleepy stuper I open my eyes to realize that the man standing over me was Marcus! I couldnt believe it. Since he left for work Thursday morning he has only been home for 13.5 hours. And of those 13.5 hours he has slept 11.5 hours, showered and gotten ready for about 1 hour, worked from home for about 30 minutes, so that leaves time with family a whooping 30 minutes. He has been at work basically NON STOP since Thursday morning. And I have had enough! The worse part about him working so much is that he can NEVER talk on the phone (our longest conversation has been 2 minutes 24 seconds), he cant return emails or texts, and he cant tell me when he will be home or IF he will be coming home. I am beginning to think "mercury spill" is code for something else. I know there are many many MANY other moms and wives who have it WAY WAY worse than I, so I shouldnt be complaining. But i cant stand to be in the dark, I want to know what is going on and what to expect next. Dont get me wrong I love a good surprise, but I dont want my whole life or week to be one big surprise.

Marcus' stay at home this morning was a brief one. He made a few work calls before coming to bed this morning, and then he was up and out the door by 9 am. As of right now his work hours total somewhere around 70 hours and that is just since Thursday people! And tonight isnt even over yet......I wonder what time he will grace us with his presence and how long the visit will last.

Kaylee barely asks anymore where Marcus is, but when she does and I respond "at work." She says "oh, I'm sorry daddy's still at work." She is so sweet!

I know i need to stop complaining, he is doing this for US! to better our life! because he loves us! and wants the best for us! It is not like he is out gallivanting around the town with who knows who........or is he? jk I know he is at work and that he would much rather be home with us, but the federal government and FedEx have him on loan until all the mercury is cleaned up.

Oh and to the complete moron that caused this problem in the first place, I hope you get a hefty fine and sit in jail for what you have done!