Ryan's Home Birth Story

The morning of Wednesday, April 2nd, 2014 will be one I never forget! I had been anticipating this moment for months (even years). I didn't know quite how it would turn out, I had played it over and over in my head and "planned" how I wanted certain things, but it turned out even better than I could ever have imagined. To say that it was perfect would be an understatement. God was definitely in control and the stars were aligned that morning.

It started the night before, I had trouble getting kaylee to bed, so I let her sleep in our bed. I had a funny feeling that she was trying to get closer to me because she knew that it was "baby night" as she and Ainslee called it. So off to bed we went and at 4:09 I awoke with the overwhelming feeling of pressure down low. I laid there for a minute desperately trying to remember how I knew it was the "real" thing with Brynlee because I remember just KNOWING that was the day.  Here is what my conversation with Marcus looked like next (notice the times)

 

We started filling the pool with water about 4:50, I called Lynda (my midwife) to let her know my progress. she asked "how far apart are they?" When I told her about 8 minutes she asked if she should come now. I sort of fumbled with my words and Marcus, very assertively said from the other room "last time when you were 8 min apart we had a baby in an hour." she said she heard Marcus and then said "we are on the way." I continued to time my contractions, pacing the house trying to figure out what I needed to do next. Then I felt like I needed to try and slow things down, they were moving too quick, so I tried getting in the polar bear pose to take the pressure off. That only lasted a few seconds before I felt like it was time to wake kaylee. I struggled to get her up, and then continued to pace the house bracing myself with the counter whenever a contraction came. I noticed my contractions jumped from 8 minutes apart to 3 minutes. I called Lynda back to tell her and she assured me they were close and coming as quickly as possible. The moment Marcus announced the pool was full I told him I needed to get in. His response was "NOW??!"  So I climbed in and my immediate reaction was "oh my gosh this feels SO NICE!" I tried to get comfortable as I awaited the next contraction. The first contraction that came while in the water was way different. I felt the pressure, but it felt different. It was like the pressure was released into the water instead of building up in me, if that makes any sense. At some point Marcus sent kaylee in to wake up Ainslee, I just can't remember exactly when that was in the timeline. So I'm in the pool and a few contractions came, and then I let out a scream I felt the urge to push, so I did and I could feel my water break like a big balloon under the water. I was so relieved, one of my biggest fears/concerns was were my water would break. I told Marcus what happened and he called Lynda back again, she told him how far away she was and he told her what happened. Next thing I know they came barging in the front door, drop their bags, and got the fetal heart monitor out to check on the baby. Next thing I know Lynda was telling me that I needed to move away from the wall of the pool because the baby would have no where to go when it came out, so I crawled to the other edge of the pool when I felt the next urge to push. I had 2 contractions close together and that was when he was born. Lynda and Marcus were there to catch him as he came into this world. I had envisioned me getting to be the one to lift my baby out of the water, I imagined how magical it would be to watch him take his first breath. But alas my plan was not meant to be, and looking back on it I am so thankful that Marcus was able to be the one to lift him up and announce his gender, especially since he is our first (and most likely only) boy.  Lynda quickly handed him to me and while I sat there in total awe of my beautiful baby all I could think was "I can't believe I have a son!"

(ignore the picture, and just listen to the sound)

I knew the entire pregnancy he was a boy but even now I still have trouble wrapping my brain around it. I get so excited when I think of all the fun things to come. I'm thrilled at the opportunity to experience what it will be like to raise daughters AND a son! Each day I fall more and more in love with him! He is more perfect than I ever could imagine and he has been the best and easiest baby so far.

After I delivered him there was no suctioning. There were no interventions. I was allowed to sit peacefully as long as I wanted, just holding and staring at him. After a few minutes of him not crying Lynda gently came over and began rubbing his feet to get him to let out a big cry to clear his lungs. And he did! We waited and waited for me to deliver the placenta before resorting to me getting out of the pool. I was helped out by Lynda and Penny (her assistant) and laid down on the couch. I had attempted nursing in the pool to try and help the placenta along and then again after I got out. Unfortunately the placenta was not budging. Now I believe the reason why I had trouble was because I pulled an oblique muscle (muscle in the side of my abdomen) and was unable to push. Thankfully with a little help from Lynda I was able to deliver the placenta about an hour after his birth and all went smoothly. Ainslee was much more interested and involved than I ever imagined, while Kaylee surprised me by not being involved; she was more interested in Ryan.  After the placenta I was able to get up and get cleaned up. Lynda did the newborn assessment on Ryan with the girls right there to watch. She examined the placenta to make sure everything looked ok, and even gave the girls a little lesson. Since I had talked at great lengths about the birth process with the girls they were very interested in that part. So Lynda let them put on gloves and touch the placenta as well as ask questions about everything. I know this isn't for everyone but I couldn't be more happy with how his birthday played out! It was PERFECT!

In the days following his birth I was able to recuperate in my own home, thankfully I had the help of lots of visitors as well as Marcus; who stepped up to the plate big time! He was amazing letting me sleep in every morning, dealing with my raging hormones, taking care of the girls, and keeping the house mostly cleaned and picked up. I do think that I over did it the first couple of days just because I can't stand being slowed down. When I see something that needs to be done I want to get up and do it immediately. Which in turn was the reason why my recovery turned out to be even more difficult than just dealing with the pulled oblique. I ended up straining my adductor muscles in both legs (muscles on the inside of your thighs). This was extremely painful, mostly at night when attempting to move/roll over.  But as far as the recovery from the actual birth and all that goes with it, that was easy and only lasted about 1/2 as long as my other births.

This is the last shot of me pregnant,

I said I wanted to do this with each pregnancy and never did.

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Ive had that post written for just about 3 months, im not quite sure why I never posted it. But SOOOOO much has happened since then, I guess I'll go ahead and update it on here.

 

The biggest update I have is one of the most upsetting things for me to think/talk about. Ryan stopped nursing. He stopped just after he turned 2 months old.  I never thought this would/could happen to me. Ive never had a big problem nursing the girls, an occasional clogged duct and that's about it. But he hadn't been latching good, he was a fussy/gassy baby, he didn't eat good, he didn't sleep good, he cried and acted like he was in pain all the time. I finally gave in when I noticed he only gained a few ounces in 5 weeks. Im not a firm believer in growth charts and all that, but I knew something was wrong and that just confirmed it. I decided to ask my midwife for help. Within hours she and a lactation consultant were at my house trying to help. After many failed attempts the LC decided to try and give him a bottle to calm him and get him a little satisfied, and then try to nurse him again. So I pumped 2 ounces, she fed it to him. I think he drank it in 29 seconds and about 10 gulps. He was STARVING! I tried nursing again and he got so frustrated and refused to latch. So I pumped more and he took it from the bottle. I tried nursing again and still he wouldn't latch. And from that day on he has only nursed a handful of times and not for very long. It took me a long time to accept our new routine. In fact im still adjusting. Ive never had a bottle baby. I feel like it was all my fault, I could've done so many things differently. I cant provide for my child. I feel like a failure. it pains me to see other moms nursing their babies. I WANT to nurse him, and I just cant. Im still pumping, but Im only getting about 1/2 of what he eat in a day. Pumping is hard and painful, and time consuming. The little chunk wants to eat SO much! I know that this is what is best for him. He is such a different baby now. He sleeps, hes happy, he talks and coos, he doesn't scream in the car, and hes not in pain! He gained 8oz in just 5 days. he barely gained 1/2 that in the 5 weeks before.

So now he is on bottles full time. He will nurse a few times a week, but never to eat, mostly just for comfort. I used to have high hopes that I could pump long enough to maybe get him back on the breast full time, but alas as the days and weeks pass the less and less I think that will ever happen. I try to focus on the positives. Having a bottle baby is so much more freeing for me. I can leave him much earlier than I could with the girls. But the lack of bonding just kills me.

 

I am so thankful for the support of marcus and my midwife and the LC. Now my little guy weighs over 14lbs. he has gained about 3lbs in the month since starting bottles. and he SLEEPS, and is so happy! We have continued chiropractic care to try and help relieve the tension and possibly help get him to latch again.

 

Here's my little man so far....

 

 

To say this little man is loved is an understatement. I wish could describe how sweet and adoring his sisters are to him. They love him beyond words......and so do I!!!

Ramblings

I finally got the time, desire, and REMEMBERED to write a little post. Im sure this will end up being a mish mosh post about a lot of different stuff, but here goes.....

First of all our cruise went fantastic! If you ever have the opportunity to go on a cruise, I highly recommend it! Such an awesome way to vacation! I wont go into details as that should be a post of its own, but I will say if I ever get around to that post the pictures will be quite limited as my phone went for a swim in the ocean and didn't survive. I lost nearly the entire vacation worth of pics. I was devastated and actually still recovering from the trauma!

Baby is doing GREAT! I had my most recent appt with my midwife today. Im only measuring 1 week ahead, which is a step up from last month when I was measuring 4 weeks ahead! Buuuuuuut I have gained more this pregnancy at the 25 week mark than I have with any of the others the ENTIRE pregnancy! So things might get a little crazy up in here the next 14 or so weeks. After the new year I plan to start getting my birth supplies ready for the big day. There are is a list of things I am responsible for collecting as well as the birth kit which will be sent directly to the house containing more of the "medical" stuff. As each day passes I cant believe the day is coming, I get more and more excited as the time passes.

Bethany did it again..............

 

 



 those, along with the new pictures on the right side of the blog, are from the most recent photo shoot with my amazing personal photographer (chuckle chuckle)!

 

School - we are still trucking along with 1st grade for Kaylee. She is set to be finished before the baby arrives, and she is working ever so diligently, because I have told her if she is not finished; when I need "help" with the baby she will be busy doing her schoolwork instead of rocking the baby, or changing diapers, or whatever else baby related that she is DYING to do! She has become quite the little reader, still does not have a love of reading like I was hoping, but I guess I can't blame her, she gets that from me I suppose.

Ainslee has been begging to do more school work. I cant decide if it is because she truly wants/needs more stimulation in that area, or if she is trying to get out of the chores she is required to do during school time. little does she know once she does start school the chores do NOT stop. But right now the plan is to purchase her Kindergarten curriculum (using the same one as Kaylee) after the new year and just taking it slow.

Brynlee amazes me daily at the tasks she can complete. She can do more than I remember the big girls doing at her age, guess that's what happens when you have 2 big sisters to watch. She loves to do whatever the big girls are doing and does not want any modifications made for her, or "baby" things substituted. She wont stand for the crayons because the big girls use markers or colored pencils, she wants whatever they have.  She is such a good listener (most of the time), but man is she a feisty little booger. And such a socialite. She doesn't know a stranger, loves any man, and wouldn't mind going to them or even kissing them (NO I don't have her kiss random strangers, Im referring to men shes never met but I know).

 

with Christmas just around the corner that means that Brynlee just celebrated her 2nd birthday! We did it small again, just the family out to an awesome "best in Memphis" Mexican restaurant. I still cant believe she is 2!

 

Speaking of Brynlee she is totally gluten free now (I told you this post would be random). I began having problems with her last Spring. mostly diaper issues, but also irritability, sleep issues, potty issues, and those are just the things I remember. Ive tried to block those few months out of my memory, because after I got things fixed with her I realize just how bad it had gotten. I decided to put her on GF diet even though her blood test came back negative (ive since learned the type I had done is next to pointless). And it has made a world of a difference! She began using the potty again, she quickly fixed bed time issues, and her irritability/clinginess stopped. She became much more independent and over all just happier! She began eating, she was down to only eating dinner 2-3 times a week. Sometimes skipping lunch and dinner in the same day.  She has put on weight, before going GF she didn't gain any weight for 9 months. I has been so amazing to see the transformation. Now she is completely potty trained, well except nap and bedtime, and even wears panties when we leave the house. I am so proud of that baby, she puts a smile on my face all day long!

 

I know its way early, but the plans are in the making for our BIG Disney trip next fall. Ive been trying to nail down most of the itinerary before having to make our dinner reservations right before the baby is born. I really hope that everything works out as planned. Much of our trip is dependent on Disney offering the free dining like they have historically. So lets all pray that happens, because if all the stars align we will have an EPIC trip next year. All SIX of us, and my mom is joining for the fun, and help with the babies!

 

And well since Ive talked about everyone else in the family I guess Marcus deserves an update too. He still works for FedEx......shocker!  Still at night.........big shocker! He started running a few months ago, but that has taken a back seat with it being peak season and all.  I look forward to the day when we can work out together, I really miss the crossfit training. That's about all that's new in his world.  If any of you would like to see him in action tune in to 20/20 this Friday (I think).

 

If I don't get around to posting again before Christmas I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!  Spend your time with those you love and cherish most, you will never get these moments back! I need to work on telling the ones I love how I feel more often. Maybe that will be my new year's resolution!

 

It's been awhile! I am still here........

Hello my faithful blog buddies!

I'm not sure many of you have hung around waiting on my next post, in fact I'm pretty sure I've lost all 6 of my readers. Which is totally understandable since it has been nearly 14 months since my last post. I'm not even going to begin to try and fill you in on everything that has gone on since I was last on here. I will fill you in on the new stuff going forward. And when I say "fill YOU in" I really mean "write this stuff down so I don't forget". If I'm friends with you on FB you know pretty much most of what has been going on with us, buuuuut......keep reading there are some surprises for you guys too!


1st we are about to go on our FIRST CRUISE!
Marcus and I have been talking about it since, well since attempting to plan our honeymoon 10 years ago, which never happened. We finally bit the bullet and booked one! All 5 of us and my mom are going on a 7 night Exotic Western Caribbean cruise next month. Our excitement level is through the roof. I told the girls I might just start packing us now.


Ok so if can you imagine how excited we are about that there is something EVEN MORE EXCITING coming up.......




Any guesses????
























































We will be welcoming baby #4 sometime late March or early April!

 

                                 the head is on the left, you can see all 4 arm and leg buds! So amazing!






And what is even MORE exciting than THAT???
We are planning a home birth! This is something I have dreamed about for years now! I am so thankful to have the full support of my husband and midwife to help me on my journey. I am perfectly confident in my body to be able to do the most natural thing mothers have been doing since the beginning of time! And I am looking forward to a peaceful experience in the comfort of our own home with no drugs, little or no intervention, and just letting my body (and baby) dictate how the story plays out! I've never been so excited about the unknown!




To answer some of the most common questions Ive gotten so far......

Where will the kids be?

Well that all depends on Mother Nature. If it happens in the middle of the night they just might miss it. But hopefully it won't. I want my kids to play as much of a part in the birth of their new sibling as they want. We will be learning lots about birth prior to the big day. And I know Kaylee will be my MW's right hand helper. My MW has already told me she will let Kaylee do as much or as little as she wants to do. Kaylee is going to be so excited when she finds out what role she will get to play.

What if something goes wrong?

This has never been a concern of mine. However, it was Marcus' biggest concern. Like I said, I am fully confident in my body, but IF something were to go wrong I trust that my MW would detect all the warning signs and take action before it was too late.

WHERE will you have the baby......the bath tub?

This one just makes me laugh! I am planning a water birth, but not in my bath tub. I will be getting a birthing tub. Whether or not I have the baby in the water is a different question. We will all just have to wait and see.

Who all will be there?

1st and foremost my husband and children. I would also love for my most favorite photographer ever to come capture everything, especially since she missed my last one. And then hopefully someone to help with the littles, not sure who that will be yet. I have definitely had people offer, which is kinda strange and cool at the same time.

(Not related to home birth)

Are you going to find out the gender of this baby?

Yes we will......when he/she is born!

 

I know there have been more questions I have already answered, but my mommy brain has kicked into full gear so remembering them just isn't in the cards. If you have any questions feel free to ask I will be happy to answer if I can.

Oh I remember one......
Do you know anyone who has done this? I have 2 "friends of a friend" who have. And I have a friend who attempted with her 1st and unfortunately ended up being transferred. Besides that I don't know ANYone!

I also want to say that over the past 14 months I have not only neglected MY blog I have not read a single blog post of yours! So I have no idea what is going on with all my blog buddies. Hope you all are well and have had a great past 14 months.

Oh i almost forgot!  How am I feeling and how far along am I?
I am 9 1/2 weeks and I feel better than any of my other pregnancies. My nausea has been very lite. Most days with none. I don't have food or smell aversions. My biggest complaint is the exhaustion. Which is totally understandable given I have 3 kids ALL DAY LONG and homeschool! But I wouldn't change it. I don't want to send them to school just so I can rest. I love that they get to share this experience with me. I love that Ainslee asks me EVERYday how the baby is feeling and how I am feeling. And Kaylee asks how big the baby is and if I can feel "her" kicking. (Kaylee is dead set on this being another girl!) and I love when I ask Brynlee to point to my baby that she immediately points to my belly button. And we never taught her that! Some people say I feel different because this is a boy. Which is a legitimate guess. But I truly attribute it to our change in life style. Mostly in the way we eat. I love that I am getting to teach the girls about REAL food, healthy food, and traditional cooking. They are catching on and building a solid foundation for a lifetime of healthy living. And that makes me more happy than the way I feel temporarily when pregnant! So feeling good is just a bonus! So I said me feeling better is "mostly" from the way we eat, I think it is also because my body is just plain ol' used to being pregnant. I mean I've been pregnant for about 29 out of the last 89 months! THAT'S CRAZY!!! Ok so there it is, all the updates. I'm not sure when I will be posting again. It just might take me awhile to get back into the swing of things.